A church inside the church?

I've been involved in several impassioned conversations over the past few days about recent events at Sacred Heart of Jesus School here in Boulder. The school refused to re-enroll the children of a lesbian couple this week, and this decision has prompted not only major press coverage but letters from across the archdiocese (soon to be beyond, I suspect, as the story has gone national).

Many local Catholics are angry that our religion is being equated with homophobia, and it is difficult to make a case otherwise when decisions like this one come from our church leaders and are reinforced above the parish level. I do not accept Pope Benedict's statement that homosexuality is a chosen behavior that is objectively disordered, but explaining why would involve several detailed, theologically oriented posts on a blog that isn't really designed for that. In short I do not believe this teaching is consistent with Christ's path of love and acceptance. Still, this current episode goes beyond that teaching, as this parish, with the backing of the archdiocese, is now choosing to refuse education to children of lesbian parents.

First, the children have done nothing wrong (even if you buy into Pope Benedict's argument, which I don't).

Second, this seems to cause irreparable harm to a family who is actively seeking Catholic education and values for their children, supposedly because they are in opposition to one of the church's teachings. Are parish schools now refusing to admit children of adulterers? Children of divorce? Children who were conceived out of wedlock? I thus find statements that this refusal is not "political" deeply, deeply unconvincing. A child's right to an education should not be based on the parents' sexual activity.

Third, and perhaps most important, the base teaching underlying this parish decision deserves challenging on a broader theological field, but several Catholic theologians who attempt to do so have been silenced and even removed from teaching positions.

I deeply, deeply regret that practicing Catholics have no voice or authority to speak for ourselves on this and other pressing social issues of our time, and especially that we lack access to a venue where church leaders would have reason to listen. Growing up in a democratic republic has not well-suited me for unquestioning acceptance of teachings that deviate from other theological threads within my church's history.

In just the past year, I've watched families flee two area parishes, some to my own current parish, some leaving the faith behind completely, because of controversies around politics and health care (again, several posts' worth of things to discuss here). During my lifetime the church has moved from the model of "aggiornamento" to a "glowing remnant," and I am no longer sure I belong within that remnant if to remain I must be an advocate for teachings I believe to be deeply erroneous. Survey after survey demonstrates that the majority of American Catholics do not hold the Church's official positions on numerous social issues, but this dissenting "church within the church" is treated as "cafeteria Catholics" who are simply too weak to hew to the official line. Our opposition and reasoned arguments are rarely if ever seriously considered and addressed, particularly at the parish level which is the height of theological discourse most practicing Catholics reach. I'm not being a snob, just pointing out that most people I know don't read papal documents and bishops' conference statements for fun.

If people within a religion who oppose some of that religion's teachings remain in active practice, are we tacitly (and financially, and otherwise) supporting a position which our consciences say are wrong? If people who oppose some of a church's teachings leave active practice of that religion, how will that church change for the better from within, and correct its errors?